The massacre that was breakfast

Blueberries now replace Spaghettio's and baked beans as the MESSIEST food to let Carsten devour. Please note the hair. If only I could have got a picture of him balancing the "balls" on his noggin. Breakfast was quickly followed by a bath. But, those fingers will remain stained for days. The jury is still out as to whether those stains will come out of the jammies. Note to self: remove all clothing prior to serving blueberries to the kid who holds the record for the worst table manners on the planet.

The men in my family only catch extremely large fish

Last weekend at the pumpkin patch / persimmon orchard

Look out world... here I come!

Could a man look any more gay? The pink sippy cup insulator seals the deal.

"Knock-Knock-Knock"

Don't worry Dad, I've got it!

Sweet Jesus, this place is like heaven.

A New Addition

So, for those of you who haven't heard the news, Danyel and I are expecting again. Very soon after I posted my entry about us trying we got the good news...




I am currently about 10 weeks pregnant and am very much looking forward to getting past the first trimester. I have been exceptionally tired from the start, even more so than I was with Carsten. I have also been pretty nauseated, but nothing too severe... pretty much like last time - no vomiting, just a disgust for food in general. For this, I owe my loss of the extra five pounds I was carrying around since having Carsten. It's amazing what eating a little less and cutting out junk food will accomplish. But, the worse side effect is what this child is doing to my face! I have been broken out constantly since the start... comparable or maybe even worse to what I went through as a teenager. I don't remember having this problem with Carsten. Actually, I think my skin was the clearest it has ever been when I was pregnant with Carsten. So, like I said, I am anxiously awaiting the second trimester when, hopefully, my hormones will adjust and things will be back to normal... well, with the exception of the life that I am growing inside of me, of course.

Danyel and I are very excited about having another child, but it's a more calm excitement than it was with Carsten. We have been here before, so it's not so new this time. We have decided not to find out the sex of the baby to add a little more excitement to it. I know most people are hoping for a girl for us, but I kind of think another boy would be nice. I think it would be nice for Carsten to have a brother. Plus, if this one is a girl, Danyel is cutting me off. I am not saying that I want more than 2 kids for sure, but I would like to have the option open to me. We have also decided not to tell anyone the names we have picked out until the baby is born. As we learned last time, everyone has an opinion, and they are quick to share it... positive or negative. We got a little flack for picking the name Carsten. In fact, I don't think anyone was crazy about it but us, and you all let us know. And, in the end, you were all wrong. The name Carsten fits Carsten perfectly. In the interim, we are calling the baby (courtesy of Danyel) 'Fetus Adolphus'. Yes, it is awful, but I like being able to address the baby as something other than 'the baby' or 'It'.

I had my first visit to the doctor a couple of weeks ago and got to see the baby bouncing around on the ultrasound as well as hear his heartbeat for a few seconds. It's amazing... no matter how many times I hear a little heartbeat inside of me it always gets me all teared up. It is the best sound I have ever heard in my life. We are due on May 21st... the day after Mother's Day. Could there be a more perfect day?

The best thing about being on round two is that a lot of the compulsive fears I had last time I was pregnant are gone. I worried about EVERYTHING last time and my fears didn't subside until I held Carsten in my arms. I am much more relaxed about this pregnancy and have more confidence that everything will turn out just fine. However, new fears have set in. I worry about not loving this baby as much as Carsten. How can I possibly have that much love left in my heart to share with another child? In the end, I know that I will, but it is just hard to imagine it now. Also, I worry about being able to handle two little ones, but again, I am sure I will manage and adapt. But, most of all, I worry about childbirth. I made no secret of the fact that going through it with Carsten was the worst experience of my whole life. I am very fearful of pushing for 2 1/2 hours again. Holy Hell, I don't think I could do that twice in a lifetime.

I will post Fetus Adolphus' first picture whenever I can get my lazy pregnant butt off of the couch and take the time to scan it and post it. Just making this post has worn me out and I am off to take a bubble bath with my Bubby.

Here's to many more...

Pookie,
Thanks for 3 wonderful years! You are the most amazing husband I could have ever imagined for myself. You are kind, sensitive, intelligent, loving, funny, energetic, loyal, honest, and full of life. You are the hardest worker I have ever met in my life and strive to provide only the best for Carsten and I. If our son is half the person that you are, I will be proud. I know life (a.k.a Carsten) gets in the way a lot and we forget to really appreciate each other, but please know that not a day goes by that I don't thank God above for the wonderful blessing that you are. I know that nobody is perfect, but you come as close as anyone can. Thank you for choosing me as your wife. I will never forget how lucky I was to find you and somehow convince you to marry ME. Aside from creating with you the most perfect person to ever walk this Earth, snagging you is, and always will be, my biggest success.

All my love forever,
S.P.A.

BTW - I am hoping that this makes up for forgetting the card to go with your gift. :-)

"M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E! It's the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, come inside, it's fun inside!"

Carsten's favorite cartoon character of the moment is Mickey Mouse. So, I went on Ebay and found this costume. He is sooooo cute in it, don't you think?! He was really excited that he WAS Mickey. It is a pretty heavyweight costume, which is perfect because we will be in North Carolina visiting friends for Halloween. It will be nice in the cool weather.

Conversation over breakfast

Me: My arm feels really sore this morning... I can't figure out why it is so sore.

Fast forward 15 minutes later. Danyel is finishing loading the dishwasher.

Me: You didn't put enough soap in the pre wash section. That's why the dishes never get clean enough. Put more soap in there, put more soap in there, OMG, PUT MORE SOAP IN THERE!

Danyel: You are such a Nazi. Your arm is sore from doing this all the time:

Trying Times

So, I am moving on from all the mushy stuff from yesterday's post... and from ripping off song lyrics...

Most of you who read this blog, the few of you that there are, already know that Danyel and I are trying for baby #2. This "trying" thing is new territory for us, as Carsten just kind of happened after like ONE time... not one whole month of trying... just one single time. We like to say we were just practicing trying.

We started along this journey last month with failed results. We thought, for sure, after all the... ummm... "trying" that we did, that there was NO WAY that we were not pregnant. But, the stick told us a different story. So, this month, I started tracking my ovulation and all the signs that go along with it. I even have a calendar that I am keeping. I would post it here for you to see, but 1.) it is incredibly not interesting, and 2.) you might be disgusted by some of the details written there. Trust me... you don't want to know that much about me and my body... ever. Also, we "tried" twice as much as we did last month. And all I can say is that if I never "tried" again in my life, I would probably be o.k. with that. I am done ovulating (TMI, I know), so we are on a "trying" hiatus and it is sweet relief! It is just so nice to crawl into bed for once at night and just... sleep.

So, we wait. The rest is up to mother nature. Bitch screwed me over last month. Hopefully this month she will show some mercy...

Anyway, now that my evenings are mine once again, I am able to get other productive things done... like this:

Chuckle all you want, but my pores are squeaky clean this morning... well, aside from the gazillion zits that I am currently sporting. But, in the words of my favorite friend and blogger, I digress.

My Superman

"Life began when I saw your face."

"I hear your laugh like a serenade."

"As you wander through this troubled world, in search of all things beautiful..."

"You can close your eyes when you're miles away, and hear my voice like a serenade."

My Super-Duper Man

"I find a refuge in the easy silence that you make for me..."

"And the peaceful quiet you create for me..."

"And the way you keep the world at bay for me."

The best $70 I have ever spent!

He played on his new slide ALL DAY long. When he wasn't playing on it, he was napping, eating, or whining to play on it. I have NEVER seen anything keep his attention for so long. Score one for mom!

My super hubby

On the way home from work today, Danyel stopped to buy stuff to make dinner. He found some recipes he wanted to try in one of our cookbooks that he had taken to work to show his assistant. Astonishingly, he didn't ask me to cook... he wanted to do it himself. I was a little worried at first being that 80% of his cooking attempts turn out very, very bad, but I was relieved that we weren't going to have to eat leftovers again... unless of course his meal was not edible, which was a very good possibility.

It was so wonderful, for once, between the hours of 4:30 and 6pm to just hang out with Carsten in the backyard as he went up and down his new slide gleefully over and over. Usually, I am cooking and feverishly trying to get dinner on the table before Carsten realizes he is starving and loses his sanity. I played with Carsten, put together his new tricycle, and drank a glass of wine. It was such a relaxing evening.

Danyel's dinner was not only edible, but quite good. He was very proud of himself as was I. I really appreciated his efforts and the fact that I got a night off. An added bonus for me was that when he has to do the cooking himself every once in a while, it serves as a good reminder for him how hard I work to put together meals for us all the time.

The bad part was I had to do the dishes since he cooked (house rules). OMG... I don't think there could have been a bigger mess! It looked as if somebody threw up all over my kitchen.

Oh, btw, he made fish and potato fritters with fava beans and bacon. Pretty fancy, huh?

Thanks Pookie!

Experts my ass!

So, recently Carsten has entered the terrible two's. It's official.

Danyel and I are losing our sanity. It's official.

Hitting. Screaming. Crying. Kicking. Screeching. Whining. Defying. Throwing. These are all occurring on a regular basis around here.

Today I took Carsten to Toys R Us to buy him a slide. He hasn't got a new "thing" in quite a while, so I decided to splurge (even though all he deserves is a swift kick in the ass). He screamed to get out of the cart and play with all the toys the ENTIRE time we were in the store. A few times I let him out to "try out" a few things to see if he liked them. So very stupid. Trying to get him back in the cart was almost impossible. He was kicking, screaming, and stiffening his body to keep me from sitting him down in the cart seat. I was so very embarrassed. I finally gave up, checked out, and got the hell out of there.

He continued screaming and crying all the way home because I wouldn't turn the DVD player on for him. The only thing that would briefly stop the madness was me screaming at the top of my lungs in the firmest voice I could conjure up, "NO! Stop that right now!". What I really wanted to say was, "Shut the hell up you beep-beep-beep. One more word out of you and I will throw your ungrateful ass right out the window!" But, I restrained myself... this time.

The other day at the doctor's office he threw a huge temper tantrum the ENTIRE time we were in the waiting area because I wouldn't let him play with the front door. I should have just let him play with it and get smacked in the face when the next person came in. That would have shut him up in no time.

Yesterday Danyel and I went to the dentist to get our teeth cleaned. I went first and towards the end of my cleaning I heard Carsten out in the waiting room pitching a full on temper tantrum... for like 10 minutes straight. I kept thinking, "Why doesn't Danyel stop him?!" I quickly snapped back into reality and remembered that it can not be stopped. You have to wait until the devil decides to exit his body.

I have been reading all my parenting books for tips to deal with this phase. Some tips are helpful... be consistent - don't give in to what ever they want or they will forever be lost to Satan, ignore the temper tantrums and they will learn that they don't get attention while throwing them, etc. I never (o.k., almost never) give in and try my hardest to ignore the temper tantrums, but when Carsten is purposely defying me or when he loses it in public, I have to do something.

Lately, when I tell him no, he looks right at me and does whatever it is I am telling him not to do over and over and over again... waiting for a reaction from me. In the past, he has always been very good at listening to us when we tell him no, so this is new territory. He is now testing us and if we don't figure out the right answer soon, we are going to fail and risk "ruining" our child.

The "Experts" say to get eye level and explain to him why he can not do what it is that he is doing and that it is unacceptable behavior. That's it. Problem solved. And if they don't stop, then what? My opinion: Trying to rationalize with an irrational 19 month old is insane. I don't want to be one of those mothers you see in the grocery store softly telling their toddler to "Please not yell in the store because it is not polite" as the child screams bloody murder. These are the kids that WALK ALL OVER THEIR PARENTS FOREVER.

The "Experts" also say to use distraction to divert their attention. This works very well for a baby, but not for a 1 1/2 year old. Carsten gets focused on whatever has sparked his interest and will. not. let. it. go. ever.

That's it. That's all the "Experts" got. I wonder if these people have even ever raised a toddler?

BTW, the "experts" also say - no spanking & no raising your voice/shouting. These discipline techniques can lead to low self esteem, anger issues, and even suicide. In that case, I might as well already give up... the damage is done and Carsten's fate is sealed.

If you ask me, these "experts" are the reason why mom's have so little confidence these days. These "experts" are the reason why so many of us have forgotten to just go with our gut and trust it. These "experts" hold us to such unattainable standards that we can do nothing but fail. These "experts" and their useless advice is why kids have no respect for their parents these days.

Anyways, against all the "expert" advice, I have tried spanking Carsten's butt/hand and it is pointless... he either doesn't even notice or he just cries harder and gets more mad and defiant. But, I do believe that spanking has it's place - just not on an irrational and emotional toddler. Raising my voice and deepening it sometimes gets results, but they are usually short lived.

So, I am now moving on to the Supernanny approach. If she can get those awful children on T.V. to behave, then certainly I can tame my tike with her techniques. I have put Carsten's old pack n play downstairs in the corner of the dining room and I have named it his "naughty box". So, when he defies me, he gets a warning and if he does it again he goes straight to the "naughty box". There, I tell him he has to remain there for 2 minutes and remind him why he is being put in there. Of course, all he hears is blah, blah, blah if anything at all being that he is usually screaming at the top of his lungs. But, whatever. This is is the best I've got. I am just hoping that he doesn't start climbing out of the pack n play or I am so screwed. So far it seems to be working o.k. We'll see how it goes in coming weeks.

I did notice, though, that if he has a good energy outlet during the day a lot of the bad behavior is curbed. Being that it is a million degrees outside right now, we don't get out much except for errand running. So, it has been rough in recent weeks. I am working on finding stuff for us to do during the day while it is still so hot outside where he can expel some of his energy. Hopefully, it will cool off within the next month or so, so we can return to our outings to the zoo, park, etc.

Anyways, wish me luck and feel free to offer any suggestions... either on how to effectively discipline my possessed toddler, or on how to effectively keep my sanity.

Traveling with a toddler

Last week we went to Destin for a few days. We've decided to make Destin our annual family vacation. It's amazing that we've decided this considering our two experiences there.

Last year, Carsten was 9 months old, teething something fierce, dealing with a cold, and sleeping awful.

This year, Carsten came down with a fever and throat infection and couldn't go to the beach and be in the hot sun, so we spent most of our time in the condo. Luckily, my parents were along for the circus and they helped out a lot so that we could get some time on the beach. I would post some pics from this years trip, but there are none... literally.

So, either we are extremely clueless or just optimistic that it has to get better, right? What is the alternative? Don't travel? This really is not an option for us. Traveling is Danyel and I's most favorite thing to do in the world. Without it, we would shrivel up and die.

However, with Carsten in tow, we know our limitations and try to stick to the beach trips. They are the most manageable of our options. There are some trips that are out of the question right now... traveling to dramatically different time zones, going places that require a lot of sight seeing, and long plane flights. But, even with the beach vacation being our best bet, we have learned very quickly that the lazy day at the beach as we know it is gone. I remember the days when we could go to the beach and just kick back, relax, and take in the fresh air (as well as numerous alcoholic beverages). We didn't know how good we had it back then. With Carsten, a day at the beach is less relaxing than having a colonoscopy. Just getting ready to go to the beach takes more time than we actually spend on the beach. Putting all our swimsuits on, slathering ourselves in sunscreen, packing all Carsten's beach toys, packing his milk and snacks, etc. It's a never ending event. Then, once we get to the beach, there is no sitting down to relax. Carsten NEVER sits still, so neither do we. We follow him up and down the beach, in and out of the surf, playing in the sand, back to the beach, up and down the stairs on the boardwalk... it never ends. Danyel and I try to take turns hanging out with the energizer bunny so that the other one can relax at least for a little bit. Most important is Carsten's mood. If it is foul, so is our experience and we have to call it a day. Then there is cleaning up afterwards. OMG, the sand! Carsten gets it in every crevice of his body and it is impossible to get it all off of him.

Danyel and I agreed that when taking Carsten along, we don't go on "vacation", we "get-away". To vacation means to relax and recharge. To get-away means just that... to get-away. As long as we accomplish that, along with some fun, create a few good memories, and spend some quality time together, then the trip is deemed a success. What more could you ask for?

Don't answer that.

OMG... I have cloned my brother!

This picture just blows me away!

Number 1: Could Carsten look anymore like Justin in this picture?? Wow...

Number 2: It looks as if Carsten went from a 19 month old to a 5 year old with just a flash of the camera... Scary.

St. John Pics

I have posted quite a few pics below. I couldn't help myself... Enjoy!

Roadside "wild" goats and donkey

The Westin Resort in St. John

View from our balcony

Pool

Island Boy

Family Fun

Beach Bums

Natural Beauty

Paradise Found...

We returned from our trip to St. John yesterday evening. It was more beautiful than I expected and very relaxing. St. John is only a 90 square mile island with 75% of it being a national park. So, it was very undeveloped and naturally beautiful. For the most part it was a very sleepy island.

Carsten was a great travel companion and fell IN LOVE with the beach. He was SO VERY active the whole time that we were there, hardly taking a moment to rest (This was a bit of a problem on the airplane, but we managed). I think he really enjoyed himself, as did we. We did not have much of an opportunity for active pursuits with Carsten along... we just played in the sun, sand, and crystal clear waters. I will write some more of our experiences and post some more pics in the next few days. We are glad to be back to the mainland!

The Devil in pink

Last week I took Carsten to the play area at Memorial City mall and we encountered the devil... in toddler form. The Bubby was playing in this area that is supposed to be like a little pond. He climbs into it and it has little hills to climb up and stand on, etc. While he was playing, this little girl (a.k.a "She-Devil") jumped in and started taunting all the kids. She-Devil was the scariest child I have ever encountered. She moved slanky-like... like a snake... and had this evil look in her eyes. She never smiled... she just had this wide eyed evil stare. I am an adult, and I was quite scared of her.

After she scared all the older toddlers and moms away from the pond area, Carsten was the only one left for her to pick on. She knew I was standing there watching him, so at first, she was very sneaky about picking on him. She would slank right by him and nudge him just enough to make him topple off whatever hill he was trying to climb. He would just laugh when he fell off thinking she was playing some kind of game with him.

I kept watching her like a hawk and was looking around to make sure her mother wasn't watching so I could rip the little She-Devil to shreds when she decided to make her move on my offspring. Eventually, she flat out just pushed Carsten down. He looked at me like, "Did you see that mom?!" and was a little confused as to what had just happened. I instantly pounced on her and very firmly told her, "No! He is just a baby and is much smaller than you. Do not push him." She looked at me coyly and continued slanking around the pond.

At one point, she came up to me and said something. I couldn't make out what she was saying. Whatever it was made no sense and sounded very cryptic. I was afraid she was trying to put me in some kind of devil worshiping trance. I didn't look into her eyes... just in case.

Not 2 minutes later, she made Carsten her victim again while staring right at me as she did it. Again, Carsten looked at me with hurt feelings and I pulled him out of the pond and said loud enough so that she could hear me, "Come on Carsten... let's go play somewhere else where you won't have to worry about being pushed around by the She-Devil." I looked deep into her evil eyes as I said it.

Anyways, she never bothered Carsten again after that. Apparently, Satan figured out I was on to him and was afraid I would blow his cover.

For the rest of the time we were there, I saw her torment kid after kid... mom after mom shooing her off their cub. I kept looking around to try and place her mom sitting on the sideline sooooo not paying attention. I never saw a mom approach her or visa versa. In fact, it seemed as if she did not belong to anyone.

I am convinced that she came straight out of the fiery pit's of hell.

Going to have to learn Spanish

When Carsten wakes in the morning, he is usually mad, crazy STARVING. Unfortunately, I am usually trying to take a quick shower and dress myself about the time he wakes up. So, we distract him from his hunger with one of his crack-like addict forming shows that put him in a trance for a good twenty minutes or so while I finish making myself not so scary looking.

This morning when he started to come out of his trance and started whining for breakfast, I reassured him that we would go downstairs and E-A-T in just a couple of more minutes. I spell words, like "eat", that send him into a whining frenzy if he hears them. He immediately started whining to go eat. He knew exactly what I was saying. He can't talk, but he can spell. Go figure.